non-profit college radio is a unique thing in its untainted, volunteer, free-speaking and up-all-night freeform beauty. but the modern marketing machine that is vying for a trusted position alongside college radio wears the disguise of an ally. college radio’s importance to the corporations has grown to such a marketable status that a circus of rotating people will weekly beckon you into their sideshow tents. many music promoters will try to get to know you well enough so that they can possibly predict if they can turn you onto a record they are working with. in the purest form of sincerity, this is helpful to both the promoter and the station md but unfortunately, this friendly ‘tip’ system fails to be ideal in the majority of instances. listed below are the much less sincere but actual examples of how paid people get you, a volunteer, to work for them. if you are a new md, it is likely you won’t run into any of these tricks right off. by the end of your term however, you probably will have been hit with every one. they are all factual and have actually happened, culled from over fifteen collective years of experience as md, pd and/or assistants.

picture music promoters as ordinary salesmen: people trying to sell you something you had not yet thought of nor would ordinarily buy. music promotion is product promotion—a form of sales. be very aware that your adding and charting of records is viewed as ‘buying’ (i.e. you have been sold on a sound). this might be seen as natural and what we do with our brains when permitted choice, but how brains other than yours hook you with their intentions will often extend into unethical, ungenuine and untruthful regions of morality. you should know that many promoters come from entirely non-music backgrounds and might not ever have worked in or for a college radio station. they have degrees in business, marketing, psychology and unrelated areas. the attention that you give music promoters earns someone somewhere money that you aren’t supposed to know or care about. their paid and ‘experienced’ angle on any current scene often clearly outdoes your uncompensated and scholastically saturated college career. they know that harassment through phone promotion has nothing to do with excellence of the music or truth in its advertising. promo theory lies closer in similarity to a sort of psychological air raid; their aim is that with increased pressure, you will bend.

promo goodies or “how many cassettes do you need?”
works well among political party members and voters, pharmaceutical conglomerates and medical professionals. it’s all marketing and has nothing to do with the product(s) they advertise. your case includes music, show tickets, clothes, posters, keychains, food, and anything the companies can afford to send you to distract you from letting their music speak for itself. it is a promoter’s important first step in the relationship between himself/herself and the md. showering you and your staff with ‘gifts’ can flatter, amuse, and show how ‘cool’ your rep wants you to view him/her and later, hopefully, deem trustworthy.

“aww...c’mon”
begging. popular use of this whine began in junior high and, yes, continues even within the sphere of ‘professionals.’ it might sound flattering for such a ‘big-time’ promoter to do this but it’s actually short for “get on board...everybody’s doing it.” it suggests your safety within numbers, endorses comfy flock/herd behavior and encourages the belief that you cannot ever be held singularly accountable for what they want you to do. it’s harder to get singled out if you’re part of the payroll…er, team.

“my ass is on the line this week”
so they have befriended you and all is fine and cool, and maybe cool enough so that the two of you talk about everything but their records anymore. very very few promoters can keep up such casual business relationships for long. no business is casual. watch how much longer they can keep their job. the promoter knows that the big day is coming. they will know when they need you and your playlist, friend.

artful trading and bribery
a far too common form of ‘trade’ offers ‘desirable’ items in exchange for chart placement. conversely, if you stray from this practice but someday get up courage to simply ask for promo copies of music for yourself, the promoter will want an exchange on their own behalf involving your chart for the same or an entirely different record. if a promoter has a computer, he/she will definitely remember what they did for you.

swapping things within the chart
if your station is concurrently playing and/or charting two different records a rep is interested in and one is doing better chart-wise, the promoter might ask you to switch the results around so that the newest and thus more ‘important’ release [to the rep] is the one doing best on your chart.

re-adding and re-charting
very new records that chart right away at your station surprise the industry. reps are happy. when the rest of the nation begins to chart it, sometimes time has elapsed enough so that your station has likely moved onto something else. your rep will be unhappy. his/her record no longer holds the chart status it used to. and at just that time “the band needs the additional support.” reps might wrongly ask you to add the record again on some meaningless date just like everyone else, teamwork style. they also might ask you to lie and put the band back on the chart.

high pressure or “but you said...”
remember your promoter’s remarkable ability to recall everything you’ve said regarding their records? often, every word of praise, criticism, “yes” and “maybe” is typed into a database and compiled for future use. being held accountable for lying is one thing, but some promoters actually got hired not understanding, or pretending not to understand, that most md’s have little to no control over free-format dj’s and their musical habits. the promoter might try to accuse you of lying, and what’s worse than lying to a ‘friend’? your guilt is implied. you are expected to feel badly and then try to correct or, in some strange mysterious way, accommodate your ‘friend’ for your insult.

singling out or “what’s wrong over there?”
translates like “aww...c’mon” [see above] but more akin to “what’s wrong with you / your dj’s / your station?” such a statement intends to mentally separate you from the flock the promoter has permitted you to be within. it means the playlist doesn’t say what the rep wants it to, i.e. none of his/her bands are on it.

ganging up / the band itself calls yo
when two separate promotion companies create a double coverage of phone calls and accompanying pressure on identical records. be aware that companies sometimes cooperate by sharing notes among themselves on which md’s are having a hard time ‘liking,’ playing, or charting the record. a sense of majority against the md is instilled again.

for even more pressure, sometimes a company puts their band up to actually calling you. bands usually have no concept of who/what you are or even why they are calling you, but they worked hard, signed the dotted line and now it’s supposedly up to you to get them paid. be careful not to confuse this tactic with indie bands, who’ve put out the records themselves, checking up on their own records.

sexism / name-calling
rare but can shake you up when your promoter stoops to such an attack and you didn’t expect it. may be just a joke among ‘friends’ but take special note of how and when in your conversation the promoter pulls this on you.

another known rep tactic is to use your name repetitively within conversations and even the same sentence for effect.

‘cut’ your service
the promoter has given up. admittedly it’s not easy to deal with irate promoters, but don’t feel badly. they know that they need you to survive as an agency and several things can happen at this point.

a] another rep from the same company will suddenly be assigned to service and call your station.
b] no calls but you will still get service.
c] no calls and no service. [you might not notice either]

even in the worst case however, the entire industry fully realizes that you are likely to be replaced or graduate within a few months. it is around next september that the offended company is likely to resume service and probable that the same promoter who cut you short will begin to leave messages again.

like a used car salesperson, your rep sizes you up from your conversations with them to see what they can get away with. reps will ask you to re-add the record, but later claim to have been joking when you call them on it. some promoters are reserved enough to wait until you volunteer your station’s own services (seeing how nice they are, you are just helping them out, right?)

promoters can offer the finest in services and kickbacks for the loose exchange of facts. consider the options they present as you being ‘bought.’ they will take note of your interest and feel free to repeat the process as they need to later.

the rep has done this to you for a reason. find out why and act accordingly. like kung-fu, if you can understand your enemies’ motives, half your problems are over.

take it as a complement when the worst happens and your promoter yells at you and is supposedly cutting your station from the list. try to rationalize why what happened actually did. obviously your station and the station playlist is very important to the promoter.

since college radio promotion is an entry-level postion, and by default represents the bottom rung of the career ladder, new employees are eager for advancement (college promotion = essentially thankless telemarketing). promoters impress their bosses with pleasant numbers and results, not only to keep their jobs but to work their way up, out of the trenches.

abusive promoters will never ask how you feel you were treated by them. caring about how they affect others would make their job a lot more difficult and their lives a lot less dealable. they don’t live with the guilt they impose on your life. ‘crazy’ industry lifestyles keep reps from losing sleep over how much they bullied you.

the degree of attention your station gets from promoters and company service relies not upon what kind of music you or your station is into or how well or hard you work to deserve it. record company service dependability relies solely on your station’s wattage, range, and market. promoters will say anything that makes you guarantee their product’s success on or off paper. they will hold you to your word and they don’t care if you actually play or like it, just as long as you chart it.

obviously this article works from a moral base. if you already have plans to schmooze and get whatever you can during your tenure from the music industry, realize that you can be held accountable for everything you say or do to earn your cd’s and tickets. lies are easy for anyone to detect and will discredit you and your station. some of you will undoubtedly play ‘the game’ as you’ll soon come to see it…for you, this article has no meaning. the promoters and agency baddies described herein need your likes in order to continue. bottom line: no matter how ‘cool’ they rarely are, promoters are paid to do this to you. don’t be naïve.